STRANGE MUSINGS

Things have slowly been returning to normal around here. Charley and I have been regaining some of our lost weight, and I have been experiencing some moments of clarity.

I made it over to town in the boat last week to get some more supplies (including lots of stuff for cleaning), and when I looked at the relatively calm waters of the bay (the wind was only blowing about 25 mph) and sunny weather (still cold, but sunny at least), I noted that I had missed most of our summer while on my bender. While it may be April in the northern hemisphere, it is feeling like what I think of as October down this way. I will have to make another trip or two in order to stock up for the next six months. After missing out on summer, it will seem like enduring two winters in a row... and down here, that is a very depressing thought.

The guys in town hadn't seen me for a while, and I think they were aghast at my appearance. If any of you recall the crummy old TV program "Grizzly Adams", I suppose you could say I have taken on that sort of appearance, although I presented a wretched, stinky, emaciated version. The guys were all concerned, and gave me some sideways looks. Apparently, a couple of them had come out to my place in late January while I was still on the bender, and they had tried to communicate with me but to no avail. The story they told was horrifying.

I had been sitting in the middle of the cabin's main room, naked, in a pile of Charley's feces. The place reeked and was completely filthy. Somehow, they deduced that I was feeding myself, feeding Charley, giving Charley water, and keeping somewhat warm. Luckily it was summer and the cabin was well insulated, but they said it was only about 10 degrees C, which equates to 50 degrees F. Although I was very much "out of it", it seems I was somehow able to regulate the use of my propane and keep myself from getting hypothermia (there is no wood down here, so we have to use electric and propane heat. I have several large propane tanks.)

I guess my visitors thought I was hopeless but they were satisfied that Charley and I were physically healthy enough. They came back about a week later with some dog food and some canned stuff for me, although I was unaware they had ever been there.

When I made my trip to town, people recognized my boat but didn't recognize me. I like the long-haired look, and I think I'll keep it for a while. The beard is getting long too, but that's fine. While the previous months have been ones of complete debauchery, I am now wearing clean clothing and have been bathing myself regularly. I've gone from around 140 pounds back up to 155, with 165 being what I normally weigh... and on a 6'4" frame, 165 is skinny to begin with. So you can imagine what I looked like at the end of what I will refer to from now on as "my time away".

The most difficult thing besides going through alcohol withdrawal, is the fact that I basically wrecked my home. It wasn't much to begin with, but the stench of feces and urine is very difficult to get rid of after one allows it to build for so many months, as I did. After shoveling out all the poop (Charley's AND mine) I scrubbed all the floors extensively, then scrubbed all the walls and even the ceilings. I have been doing this daily. I am getting tired of the smell of the Pine-Sol-type disinfectant mixed with the stench of copious accumulated eliminations, but I'm noticing more Pine-Sol and less poop and pee, so things are getting better.

I haven't had a drink now for a few weeks, and I hope I can stay sober for a while. Staying off the cabbage-smoking habit will be tough too, but I will be working hard at that. Wish me luck.

And, I am still considering getting out of this place and finding somewhere warmer. I understand there are still some totally deserted Pacific atolls, but I also understand the flies can be pretty intolerable at those places. Someplace like Pitcairn might be interesting, but I don't know if I would want to be on such a small island with other people around... it might feel claustrophobic. At least out here there isn't anybody else around.

Snave says there are some places in northeastern Oregon that are very isolated but which are not far from "civilization"... I'll warn you Snave, I may have to check it out.